Shopping heaven.

Posted: October 6, 2010 in Mix
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Being a woman … shoping should mean the world to me. It should be my own personal catharsis and the mall my personal shrine. The emphasis is on “should”. I hate it.

1.) The salesperson is not human.

If you need help … there is nobody around. If you are just browsing they are allllllll over you. Plus … they are injected with “snail speed toxin”.

2.) Parking is a destination to hell.


3.) People … a lot of people. CROWD … LINES.

4.) And my fav … a person … in line … behind u. Pushing the trolley UP YOUR ASS! FFS … step away from my butt!

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Comments
  1. My favourite hatred is sales people who say ‘this is a really good jean’ why f….ing singular it’s rubbish.

    At this point I know I’m not going to buy and so I play this game.

    Q: Are these a narrow fit? (said +ve ly)
    A: Yes
    Q: Shame I wanted something baggier really……
    A: (helplessly) well they’re not that narrow

    It works as well with a ‘loose fit’ obvious;y.

    ah you see how small victories can be pleasing…

  2. nexru says:

    We don’t have a singular here….but I like your game. 🙂 It would go well at our local stores…I couldn’t stop noticing that sales people are older in small town shops and more eager to sell u….well….everything. If they don’t have what u want they just start pushing everything else they have stocked up.

    And I hate the patronizing part at the end: “You won’t regret it.” or something similar. Like they want to make u feel u’ve made a purchase of the century.

  3. re
    we don’t have a singular here…

    Neither do we… that’s where the ‘grammar fascist’ comes and seeks immediate and severe revenge.

    Of course, the other game involves camera stores:
    Q: what sort of camera do you have, Sir?
    A: A pentax
    Q: Me too! (…yeah…sure!)
    A: Sorry… what am I saying? it’s a panasonic
    (that’s put a stop to your f…ing patronising little game, you cretin)

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